Monday, July 7, 2008

Toys R Definately Not Us

One romp through the local Toys R Us and it's apparent that the IQ level of our favorite hell house employees is just a little lower than the clientèle. I can honestly tell you, from an ex-employee at this glorified Chucky Cheese with higher prices, It didn't used to be that easy. From working the stockroom to restocking the shelves, there's really so many products, it kind of makes you pee a little. There is, however, a grading curve that even the tiniest tots can surpass without breaking a sweat.

The infamous pink dog. Oddly, it looks just like a cat.....but it has to be a dog, right? No one's that stupid. Maybe one of the high school dropouts forgot what a doggy looked like. Somebody should've invested in a speak and spell.... I hear even Leatherface had one. Although, it would have been nice if the toy industry would adhere a little more closely to the child labor laws seen here. Those poor children. At least they won't be labeling anything wrong, of Jeffrey will have their green cards. Besides, rules were enforced more harshly and corporate douche bags were stricter. That's how the Marlboro Man met his end. The Man spoke and the cowboy listened. You have to become a product of the product...and I'm starting to wonder what kind of product turns teenagers into mindless retards......(<----ahem). But seriously, I'll give my two cents on a theory that might make you think twice about pushing this "spelling" phenomena on your children. You guessed it........ You didn't? Oh, right... Picture please. Don't trust the puppets. I hear the red one's the leader.


damon said...

Nothin worse than gettin a cap popped in ya by a ticklish furball.

My favorite part of the whole Toys-r-us experience has got to be the joyous greeting I get from the brain dead moron working the ONLY open register.

Geoffrey must be proud.

The Hypocritical One said...

My wife went to R-US on "black friday"...she said the checkout line went aroung the store twice. Did you get paid extra on that day?

Anonymous said...

That place should be burnt.